Next Diva In Line

The Divine Miss M., as anybody with their eyes open might have noticed, is promoting a new Xmas album, appearing daily on talk shows, and was never actually available for the movie, million bucks or not. I called my executive at the network and asked her, perhaps a shade too firmly, to help us cut through the corporate slo-mo and get another offer out, like, NOW. She and I were both hoping for Ann-Margret. What her boss, the Head of the Network, decided may be even better. The Head of the Network authorized an offer to a truly Astonishing Actress, an icon of prestige and artistry for four decades. The offer went out last night, in record speed. Astonishing Actress was to have looked at a DVD of my Young Star and read the script last night. I am to be on call all day, at lunch and between shots, to speak to Astonishing Actress if she should so desire. I think I would jump off Half Dome if Astonishing Actress should so desire.

Light your candles for me, gentle reader.