Excuse me?

One of the roles in my movie is a psycho-alcoholic-white-trash North Carolina loser who beats his daughter half to death. The Germans who are partially financing the movie today announced that they were strongly suggesting that we hire, for that role...

...Hart Bochner.

You may remember Hart Bochner as the yuppie who collaborates with the bad guys in Die Hard. Hart Bochner is a very good actor who never fails, in every role he has ever played, to embody elegance, charm, wealth and urban sophistication. Whatever those Germans are smoking, I want some. And beyond that, in what universe does Hart Bochner, twenty years after an appealing supporting turn in Die Hard, attract any kind of audience to a film, in Germany or anywhere? "Oh, wow, Helga, we better turn on the TV tonight, Hart Bochner's on!"

!!?

In other casting news, the network has decreed that our first offer for the lead role must go out to...

...Sarah Michelle Geller.

That's right, the same Sarah Michelle Geller who earned possibly a hundred million dollars or more playing Buffy for nine years and picked up some more loose change in Cruel Intentions and I Know What You Did Last Summer and other feature films. Oh yeah she is definitely going to play Hart Bochner's daughter in my perfectly fine little cable movie for three hundred thousand bucks.

In the end, though, I strongly believe there is a God of Casting, who has always been with me on every movie I have ever made, and that in the end the right actors will fall out of the sky and onto my set.

Stay tuned.